Episode 44
E44: Secure Your Mission with Cathy Sikorski
According to statistics, 90% of women’s income is invested back into their families for nutrition, education, and healthcare. As the mother of a high school junior, I can definitely attest to this. We women are naturally caregivers. Unfortunately, this generosity can strain our well-being and financial future.
This episode’s guest is Cathy Sikorski, an Elder Law attorney, blogger, and video influencer, who makes complex legal and financial issues digestible and helps you to avert a crisis in caregiving, aging, and retirement.
Among the wisdom Cathy shares:
- How being a caregiver to families is a dubious honor because of the accountability
- Long-term care insurance as an important safety net for self-employed caregivers
- Why it’s essential to get powers of attorney in relation to your finances and healthcare
Let’s avoid the financial pitfalls that surprise too many women due to our selflessness. As the saying goes, “You need to secure your own mask first before assisting others.” That is the most loving thing you can do.
More About Our Guest:
Cathy Sikorski, an Elder Law attorney, blogger, and video influencer, distills complex legal and financial issues and helps you to prepare before a crisis in caregiving, aging and retirement. Sikorski has written three books, the most recent book, 12 Conversations: How to Talk to Almost Anyone About Long-Term Care Planning, was released in October 2021. Sikorski has educated financial, long-term care, insurance, and HR professionals, caregivers, social workers and many more about serious planning. Her appearances include television, radio, and podcasts. She was featured on the Huffington Post, AARP, written a one-act play for Writers Theater of New Jersey, and is a SheSource expert for the Women’s Media Center in Washington, D.C.
Connect with Cathy Sikorski:
Connect with Erin and find the resources mentioned in this episode at hourlytoexit.com/podcast.
Erin's LinkedIn Page: https://www.linkedin.com/in/erinaustin/
Think Beyond IP YouTube Page: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCVztXnDYnZ83oIb-EGX9IGA/videos
Music credit: Yes She Can by Tiny Music
A Team Dklutr production
Transcript
Hello ladies.
Speaker:Welcome to the Hourly to
Speaker:Exit podcast.
Speaker:I'm very
Speaker:excited for our episode today.
Speaker:I have Kathy Sikorski,
Speaker:with us to talk about some thing
Speaker:that will be of interest to.
Speaker:All of us, which is, very directly
Speaker:related to the key value here at
Speaker:a exit, which is getting more wealth
Speaker:in the hands of women because we
Speaker:think that will change the world.
Speaker:And so before I introduce
Speaker:Kathy, I'm gonna rattle off a few
Speaker:statistics about.
Speaker:Why it's so important to get
Speaker:more wealth in the hands of women.
Speaker:So I was reading a recent Forbes
Speaker:article that said that women tend to
Speaker:invest more than 90% of their assets
Speaker:in earnings back into their families
Speaker:for nutrition, education,
Speaker:healthcare, and more.
Speaker:In contrast, men only invest about
Speaker:44% of their incomes back into
Speaker:their families.
Speaker:Women build wealth to support a broader
Speaker:set of goals for their family, for
Speaker:philanthropy, and for the world.
Speaker:the stats I have on my website,
Speaker:women give twice as much of their
Speaker:wealth to charitable causes than men.
Speaker:They're almost twice as likely to
Speaker:say that the act of donating is the
Speaker:most satisfying part of having wealth.
Speaker:their financial wellbeing is
Speaker:influenced by their sense of
Speaker:responsibility for others, for
Speaker:their families, for the community,
Speaker:and for society.
Speaker:and that women are nearly twice
Speaker:as likely as men to say that
Speaker:they've discussed philanthropy with
Speaker:their children, which I think is
Speaker:a great stat so that we're raising
Speaker:a generation of charitable givers.
Speaker:And so of course women aren't
Speaker:just generous with their money.
Speaker:They're also generous with
Speaker:their time.
Speaker:And so we are gonna talk about
Speaker:that, our role as caregivers and
Speaker:sometimes, perhaps at our own expense.
Speaker:So with that, Kathy, please introduce
Speaker:yourself to the
Speaker:audience.
Speaker:Hi everyone.
Speaker:I'm so happy to be here, for so
Speaker:many reasons.
Speaker:To be invited into this room to
Speaker:talk about what I talk about.
Speaker:And what I do is very expanding
Speaker:for all of us.
Speaker:And so I'm thrilled to be here to talk
Speaker:about my topic, which is I am
Speaker:an elder lawyer, which means I deal
Speaker:with elder law issues, Medicaid,
Speaker:Medicare, people in nursing homes,
Speaker:social security, et cetera, et cetera.
Speaker:But I have done that for well over
Speaker:30 years, and I have found that.
Speaker:Actually, elder law isn't even, I was
Speaker:a regular lawyer for one of a better
Speaker:word, elder law is kind of new, and
Speaker:it's grown with these issues of
Speaker:nursing homes and Medicaid and the
Speaker:cost of care because we're getting older.
Speaker:We're, baby boomers, there's more of us.
Speaker:And so it's, really kind of
Speaker:a newer field.
Speaker:So maybe 20 years I've been doing it.
Speaker:but what I found being a caregiver
Speaker:for eight different family members and
Speaker:friends during this period of time, not
Speaker:as my job, but as a person with a big
Speaker:family who needs help and is a the
Speaker:punitive expert in the family, is that,
Speaker:women especially tend to put aside
Speaker:their financial wellbeing in order
Speaker:to what they think is to create, Other
Speaker:wellbeing within the family, and
Speaker:that isn't always the wisest choice,
Speaker:and that isn't always even the
Speaker:necessary choice.
Speaker:They don't even know that there's options
Speaker:out there for them.
Speaker:So I feel like I often have this
Speaker:twofold conversation like number one.
Speaker:is it gonna cost you money to
Speaker:be a caregiver?
Speaker:and number two is there a way to
Speaker:get paid for doing what you are doing
Speaker:as a caregiver without putting
Speaker:your financial future and wellbeing
Speaker:into jeopardy?
Speaker:Because it's very likely that the
Speaker:person that you are taking care
Speaker:of, which might be a woman, your mom,
Speaker:your mother-in-law, et cetera, has
Speaker:put herself in financial jeopardy.
Speaker:That's why your caregiving for her.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So there's a lot of, layers to
Speaker:this onion that we could, unpeel that
Speaker:could go on for, as you can imagine,
Speaker:days, hours, weeks.
Speaker:but the money part is really important,
Speaker:and that's what I actually love about
Speaker:your work, Erin, is quite frankly,
Speaker:it's the money part.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:We women have lots of value.
Speaker:We have lots of expertise.
Speaker:We have lots of things that we bring
Speaker:to the table, but for some reason
Speaker:we forget about the money piece.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:we do, we value our ourselves
Speaker:in so many ways.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So my, experience, my expertise is
Speaker:in the legal part of this and the
Speaker:financial part of it because there's a
Speaker:huge piece to issues in caregiving,
Speaker:and so I educate.
Speaker:People and now I'm moving into
Speaker:corporations and work and, financial
Speaker:advisors, et cetera, about the legal
Speaker:and financial need for preparation for
Speaker:everyone properly so that no one
Speaker:gets left behind.
Speaker:Yeah, that's great.
Speaker:So, usually we were talking before we
Speaker:started recording about the, diversity
Speaker:of guests that I've had on the podcast.
Speaker:And I will say that typically
Speaker:I usually know just enough to be
Speaker:dangerous about the topics that they're
Speaker:going to cover.
Speaker:And on this one, I feel fairly out
Speaker:of my death even though it is,
Speaker:some legal issues.
Speaker:not because I'm unfamiliar with
Speaker:it, but because I've failed so
Speaker:spectacularly in being, a
Speaker:caregiver myself.
Speaker:until very recently I was, one of
Speaker:the sandwich generation with a.
Speaker:Mother in her late eighties and I
Speaker:have a teenager and running a business
Speaker:and running a home as a single woman.
Speaker:And so there are all the things
Speaker:happening.
Speaker:And so, you talk about, work life
Speaker:balance and which I've found to be,
Speaker:maybe I don't know what it means.
Speaker:So maybe we'll talk there.
Speaker:Cause I feel like
Speaker:I just haven't
Speaker:quite cracked that nut.
Speaker:So, tell me how that, how
Speaker:you look at
Speaker:that.
Speaker:It's impossible.
Speaker:Good.
Speaker:It's not just me, that's how
Speaker:I look at it.
Speaker:however, we can get better at it.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:If we pay attention to, resources that
Speaker:are available to us to help us do
Speaker:better for ourselves and our loved ones.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So, there's lots of.
Speaker:People doing this caregiving thing,
Speaker:there's people like us who work for
Speaker:ourselves, right?
Speaker:And so when we step out of the
Speaker:workforce, we're stepping out
Speaker:of our own work and our own,
Speaker:responsibilities and maybe not
Speaker:taking on as many clients and et
Speaker:cetera, et cetera.
Speaker:But there is the whole, this
Speaker:53 million of unpaid family
Speaker:caregivers are not unpaid people.
Speaker:They're workers.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:They're working at jobs where they
Speaker:actually go to work.
Speaker:And when I say go to work, I just
Speaker:mean, maybe they're working from home,
Speaker:but they have time where they're
Speaker:putting in at work.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And.
Speaker:so to educate our audience about very
Speaker:simplistically, let's start
Speaker:with the basics.
Speaker:You need to be a caregiver.
Speaker:You need legal things in place.
Speaker:You need to have powers of attorney.
Speaker:You need to have financial powers
Speaker:of attorney and healthcare powers
Speaker:of attorney.
Speaker:These are the 32nd definition.
Speaker:It is a document that you sign
Speaker:that gives the authority to someone
Speaker:else to act as if they are you in.
Speaker:Every possible capacity, either
Speaker:with their finances or their healthcare
Speaker:super powerful document, you are
Speaker:giving someone a great amount
Speaker:of authority.
Speaker:But if they are incapacitated,
Speaker:whether it be temporarily or
Speaker:permanently, they need someone to
Speaker:take care of their affairs for them.
Speaker:And that's what everybody needs.
Speaker:And everyone 18 years of age or
Speaker:older in this country should
Speaker:have one because anybody can get hit
Speaker:by a bus tomorrow.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And you may not be able to handle your
Speaker:affairs, whatever that means, right?
Speaker:They get more complex as a
Speaker:document, as you get more assets,
Speaker:as you get more responsibilities
Speaker:or whatever.
Speaker:And so I'm just saying that.
Speaker:The concept of a power of attorney
Speaker:is very, very often missed
Speaker:until it's very late in the game.
Speaker:Oh my god.
Speaker:Mom is really sick.
Speaker:she's in the nursing home.
Speaker:She's in the hospital.
Speaker:I need, nobody will let me do anything.
Speaker:I can't move her money around.
Speaker:I can't pay her bills cuz I
Speaker:don't have power of attorney.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So if you know that somebody you love,
Speaker:you're gonna have to care for, or
Speaker:you're helping them, make sure you have
Speaker:those documents, you gotta have 'em.
Speaker:and everybody talks about a will.
Speaker:They're great.
Speaker:I love wills.
Speaker:Yeah, they're great.
Speaker:But actually in my world, wills
Speaker:are like the least important thing.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Because, Powers of attorney are for
Speaker:live people who are sick, and wills are
Speaker:for dead people.
Speaker:It's that simple, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And then in between, that little niche
Speaker:is something that we talk about living
Speaker:will and advanced directives, which is
Speaker:if someone is in a permanent vegetative
Speaker:state, what do they want me to do?
Speaker:And in the vernacular it's,
Speaker:do you want me to pull the plug or
Speaker:not pull the plug?
Speaker:Really?
Speaker:That's what it is.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So you gotta have this conversation
Speaker:with your loved one and you gotta have
Speaker:a piece of paper that says so and
Speaker:not honestly not.
Speaker:Cause that piece of paper is so great in
Speaker:a hospital setting.
Speaker:It's because I am one of
Speaker:seven children.
Speaker:If my mom, 90 year old mom, who is
Speaker:a hoot and a half right now, and go
Speaker:on TikTok and look me up, you'll see
Speaker:the two of us.
Speaker:We have a lot of fun together, but
Speaker:if she goes to the hospital, all these
Speaker:kids are coming in with all their
Speaker:spouses and all their grandchildren,
Speaker:and some of their great-grandchildren
Speaker:will have 56 people in a room trying
Speaker:to decide what do we do with mom?
Speaker:She's in a permanent vegetative
Speaker:state, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:I don't want that.
Speaker:I got a piece of paper that mom
Speaker:signed that says, this is what
Speaker:we're gonna do.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And I say, I might not even do this,
Speaker:but this is what mom said and so this is
Speaker:what we're gonna do.
Speaker:It takes the decider off the hook.
Speaker:So that's your basic stuff, right?
Speaker:That does not address at all
Speaker:the work-life balance issue and
Speaker:the difficulty of the cost of care.
Speaker:Obviously not just financially,
Speaker:but physically, emotionally.
Speaker:whatever.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:for people like you and I who have their
Speaker:own business, we don't have someone
Speaker:that's gonna give us paid time off
Speaker:or family and medical leave or,
Speaker:stuff like that.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:It doesn't mean there's not
Speaker:resources out there for us, but
Speaker:it does mean that it's a little bit
Speaker:harder for us.
Speaker:but here's two things right off
Speaker:the top of my head.
Speaker:Get paid.
Speaker:If your mom has assets and she
Speaker:would pay a complete stranger to come
Speaker:in and take care of her, she can
Speaker:pay you the same $25 an hour to pay.
Speaker:You get a contract signed, preferably
Speaker:with a lawyer's, approval.
Speaker:So it looks like you're not
Speaker:self-dealing and get paid.
Speaker:It might not be.
Speaker:You might earn $250 an hour, so it's
Speaker:not gonna make up for that, but it
Speaker:keeps you in the Social Security
Speaker:and 10 99 yourself, by the way.
Speaker:It keeps you in the Social
Speaker:Security loop.
Speaker:It keeps you in the Social Security
Speaker:disability loop.
Speaker:You are still getting paid right?
Speaker:Wow.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:So would you have put this in
Speaker:place the same time that you're putting
Speaker:together the other,
Speaker:because otherwise, like, let's
Speaker:say they're
Speaker:already in capacity.
Speaker:Sure.
Speaker:They can't enter this agreement.
Speaker:Why not?
Speaker:Of course.
Speaker:Why not?
Speaker:you don't have to take the
Speaker:money right away.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:But honestly, the other thing I say is
Speaker:if you really don't need the money,
Speaker:take it anyway.
Speaker:Because two things.
Speaker:Number one, put it in your ira.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:You're losing time to create wealth for
Speaker:you in your future.
Speaker:In case this happens to you.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:So if you really don't need 20, put
Speaker:it in your ira.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:And secondly, it is a way for you to put
Speaker:everyone on notice.
Speaker:And I am working here.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:somebody said something to me
Speaker:very interesting yesterday.
Speaker:She said, me and my sister, my
Speaker:mom got very sick very quickly.
Speaker:They were in their thirties.
Speaker:they weren't prepared.
Speaker:Their dad was living, but they
Speaker:came in to do the hands-on, and she
Speaker:said the saddest part for me was we
Speaker:spent so much time being caregivers,
Speaker:we didn't spend time with my mom
Speaker:as daughters while she was dying.
Speaker:Mm.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Oh God, this is really, it
Speaker:hurt, it breaks my heart, right?
Speaker:That they couldn't be.
Speaker:In the relationship of mom and daughter,
Speaker:because they had to call the
Speaker:doctor, they had to make sure the
Speaker:hospice was coming.
Speaker:They had to, give her a sponge
Speaker:bath if somebody had put other
Speaker:money in place.
Speaker:That's the second thing.
Speaker:Long-term care insurance.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:If you can afford that.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And if you're young, you can
Speaker:really afford it.
Speaker:If you put that in place, it
Speaker:lets your family be your family.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Yes, I agree.
Speaker:And honestly, if they have to work
Speaker:for you, they can get paid out
Speaker:of that kind of a product too.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And then there's a whole raft of
Speaker:organizations that have come about in
Speaker:the last few years because Medicaid
Speaker:has allowed them to pay family members.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:Never spouses.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:But other family members.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And you may very well, if your person
Speaker:is not a person of assets or means they
Speaker:may qualify for a Medicaid benefit and
Speaker:you can literally work for them,
Speaker:and you get paid.
Speaker:Wow.
Speaker:So what if you have a niece who is in
Speaker:college mm-hmm.
Speaker:And can do this part-time paid.
Speaker:We have to get ourselves out
Speaker:of the mindset that this is.
Speaker:A gift that we give to our loved
Speaker:ones, that we make the supreme
Speaker:sacrifice of giving up every other
Speaker:asset or financial, thing that we
Speaker:have in order to take care of mom.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Because I'm not saying you don't
Speaker:need to take care of mom.
Speaker:That's wonderful if you can, but
Speaker:money isn't the problem here, isn't
Speaker:the evil one here?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:There's lots of ways to transfer
Speaker:the money so that, as I've said
Speaker:three times now, you aren't mom
Speaker:30 years from now with no money.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Especially if there's no one to
Speaker:take care of you.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:That is scary.
Speaker:Do you say a couple things that I
Speaker:wanna just back up.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:And kinda just relate my personal
Speaker:experience, frankly.
Speaker:one was about the advanced
Speaker:directors of medical directives and if
Speaker:you're loved, one is, in a vegetative
Speaker:state or something.
Speaker:One of the things that's happened with
Speaker:Covid and that I have with my mother
Speaker:is that, They are in the hospital
Speaker:and, and they are awake, aware you
Speaker:can talk to them, but you're can't
Speaker:be alone with them.
Speaker:At least they couldn't at
Speaker:the time.
Speaker:I know things have changed, and you're
Speaker:not allowed to discuss their care.
Speaker:Like her doctors would not allow me
Speaker:to ask her, what do you want me to do?
Speaker:And so there can be circumstances
Speaker:where you have someone who.
Speaker:where there's, for me there was
Speaker:a circumstance of what do I do while
Speaker:she's deteriorating, but still here?
Speaker:So, and yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And,
Speaker:not wanting to miss that window of being
Speaker:able to be with her.
Speaker:Well, of course the first side is, it'd
Speaker:be great if we have these conversations
Speaker:beforehand.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So if you can, if you're
Speaker:hearing this Mm.
Speaker:And you can.
Speaker:It's hard, but you gotta go sit down.
Speaker:Honestly, 12 conversations, my
Speaker:book, that tells you how to have some of
Speaker:these conversations.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:you gotta have the conversations.
Speaker:And if you can, and you're fortunate
Speaker:enough to be able to do that
Speaker:now, do that.
Speaker:but you're, telling us a
Speaker:different story.
Speaker:You're saying here we are
Speaker:in the crisis.
Speaker:I can't talk to her about this.
Speaker:The doctors won't let me, which is
Speaker:the craziest thing I've ever heard.
Speaker:I don't even understand what
Speaker:that means.
Speaker:But they
Speaker:said, well, but I could not ask her
Speaker:for her opinion.
Speaker:like you have to make the decision.
Speaker:You can't do that.
Speaker:It wouldn't, they didn't consider
Speaker:her to be, able to, contribute
Speaker:even though you could talk to her
Speaker:and ask her how she, you know.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:okay.
Speaker:Well,
Speaker:Wait till they leave the room.
Speaker:Well, they wouldn't let me in the room.
Speaker:practical solutions are sometimes better
Speaker:than any anyone's.
Speaker:but I guess that's where family
Speaker:history comes into play, right?
Speaker:I mean, it's your mom and I hope that
Speaker:you know your mom well enough to know
Speaker:you're gonna have to make a decision.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Based on what you know about her in
Speaker:terms of history.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:I will tell you that being this caregiver
Speaker:for eight different family members and
Speaker:friends, yes, I've had to make some
Speaker:tough decisions and yes, I still live
Speaker:with some regrets.
Speaker:Not even to tell you, oh, I made
Speaker:the wrong decision, but did I make the
Speaker:right decision?
Speaker:it's more of a question about
Speaker:that, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:I honestly think that's a case
Speaker:for therapy.
Speaker:It was, right?
Speaker:I mean, to be honest with you, that's
Speaker:where I would have to resolve that.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Because, Even if you've had all
Speaker:the conversations, you've got all
Speaker:the paperwork, you did all the
Speaker:right things, crisis is crisis.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And you're gonna have to make
Speaker:decisions and you're going
Speaker:to second guess yourself later, if
Speaker:not in the moment.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:and that's part of it.
Speaker:and I will tell you the beauty of so
Speaker:much attention being given to caregiving
Speaker:now, and it's taken a long time.
Speaker:Do you know Erin?
Speaker:I looked up yesterday cuz I
Speaker:was quoting her.
Speaker:Rosalyn Carter started the
Speaker:Institute for Caregivers in 1987.
Speaker:Wow.
Speaker:35 years, this woman, and she's
Speaker:still alive, as you may know.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Almost hundred years is still fighting
Speaker:for the rights of caregivers and
Speaker:caregiving families.
Speaker:but the, thing, because there's so
Speaker:much now, so many organizations, so
Speaker:much, one of the things that there's
Speaker:so much support about, okay, you're
Speaker:gonna feel bad, you're gonna have
Speaker:regrets, you're gonna have guilt,
Speaker:you're gonna have, all of those things.
Speaker:I would say, so the answer is, since
Speaker:we're talking about it, prepare as
Speaker:much as you can, do the best you can.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:It's kind of like raising
Speaker:children, isn't it?
Speaker:And.
Speaker:Talk to a therapist, it's over.
Speaker:That is fair.
Speaker:That is fair.
Speaker:Now the other piece of that was after my
Speaker:mother passed, and I am the executor
Speaker:of her will and.
Speaker:I felt, and I kind of feel this
Speaker:way, I'm thinking about that this
Speaker:with my kid, is that, being the
Speaker:executor kind of has interfered with my
Speaker:grief process and,
Speaker:which is exactly what these daughters
Speaker:were saying to me yesterday.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:and, what are the options for,
Speaker:people don't think of anyone else
Speaker:being able to do this for them.
Speaker:what are the options if you're not,
Speaker:a rich person?
Speaker:You know the thing, often the
Speaker:person making the will thinks this
Speaker:is some kind of a gift or an honor
Speaker:that they're giving to let someone be
Speaker:their executor.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:It is a dubious honor at best.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:The business of death is horrible.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:The business of death, the only good
Speaker:redeeming quality, in my opinion
Speaker:about the business of death is quite
Speaker:frankly, keeps you so busy that it.
Speaker:Tamps down your grief until you
Speaker:have a chance to sit in it.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:in a whole way.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:so that may have some value.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Because you gotta do some things.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:I mean, nobody who knows the job ever
Speaker:wants the job.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:but I would say, That if you are in
Speaker:a position and you are, working with
Speaker:a family member and they have decided
Speaker:you're gonna be this person and
Speaker:you know, you don't want this cuz you're
Speaker:the caregiver, encourage them to
Speaker:choose someone else.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Someone who the business part won't
Speaker:be daunting to them.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:It won't be emotional to them.
Speaker:now in your case, maybe you didn't
Speaker:have anyone, if you're an only child
Speaker:or if your adult child is an adult
Speaker:enough yet mm-hmm.
Speaker:They can't do it.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:That kind of a thing.
Speaker:I will tell you, you're probably
Speaker:not gonna like this answer,
Speaker:but I don't like sharing that job.
Speaker:Having two people have the job,
Speaker:sounds like, divide and conquer,
Speaker:but more, that's more of a problem
Speaker:than anything.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And you, having done it, you would
Speaker:probably understand having to sign
Speaker:papers, having to be available
Speaker:to, go through documents, whatever.
Speaker:If you need someone else and they live
Speaker:in another state, or they have a
Speaker:busy life just like you, that's gonna
Speaker:extend this torture longer than it
Speaker:needs to be done.
Speaker:So, right.
Speaker:I don't like that.
Speaker:And the third thing I wanna
Speaker:say about this, cuz it's really
Speaker:important, cause old people love to
Speaker:make their oldest child the executor
Speaker:or their son.
Speaker:Now they live in Virginia, youngest
Speaker:only daughter.
Speaker:They live in Virginia like you
Speaker:do, let's say.
Speaker:And their son lives in Seattle
Speaker:and they're gonna pick their son
Speaker:who's in Seattle.
Speaker:And I'm like, what are you doing?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:I really, really don't
Speaker:recommend this.
Speaker:It's not a good idea.
Speaker:You've gotta pick someone who's here,
Speaker:the, where the estate is, where the
Speaker:physical need to do the paperwork is.
Speaker:And I know we do a lot of things online
Speaker:now, but trust me, it's better to be
Speaker:where your stuff is.
Speaker:Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker:So, absolutely.
Speaker:So, yeah, and if it's okay with
Speaker:you, I'd like to veer a little left.
Speaker:Sure.
Speaker:Which is just talk about work
Speaker:and caregiving where people who
Speaker:work in corporate America mm-hmm.
Speaker:You have so many things available to
Speaker:you that you don't even know about.
Speaker:for instance, you probably have
Speaker:legal benefits, but you haven't
Speaker:thought about it in terms of a power
Speaker:of attorney or powers of attorney
Speaker:for your parents.
Speaker:You think about it if you have a D U I
Speaker:or if you have, an accident, you need
Speaker:to get a lawyer.
Speaker:That's a really, as I told you, the
Speaker:critical piece.
Speaker:If you have legal benefits, use them
Speaker:for this part, for the caregiving part,
Speaker:you can use it for a family member.
Speaker:Well, this, okay, maybe not, but
Speaker:I haven't met a lawyer yet who
Speaker:said is gonna say, no, no, no.
Speaker:I don't wanna do any work for anybody
Speaker:else in your family.
Speaker:Okay.
Speaker:Oh yeah.
Speaker:You say, I'm gonna come in,
Speaker:I'm gonna bring my parents in and.
Speaker:Would you mind giving us the same
Speaker:wonderful, 20% off or whatever that
Speaker:you're giving me.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And then I'm gonna tell my brother
Speaker:and sister it's probably not for
Speaker:your family members, but lawyers don't
Speaker:turn business away.
Speaker:We're not in the business
Speaker:of doing that.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:We want clients.
Speaker:Boy, do we want families?
Speaker:That's even better.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:So use your legal benefits.
Speaker:yes.
Speaker:Use it for your parents in whatever
Speaker:fashion you can check out.
Speaker:Long-term care insurance.
Speaker:Do you have that at work?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Check it out.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Just at least look at it.
Speaker:When my husband had it many years ago,
Speaker:you could buy it for your parents.
Speaker:How cool is that?
Speaker:Hmm.
Speaker:And it's coming back in a big way as a
Speaker:corporate benefit.
Speaker:Yes.
Speaker:And if you're in the C-suite, you can
Speaker:deduct that, premium as a, deductible
Speaker:either I don't know if it's a health
Speaker:cost or business cost, but it's a
Speaker:deductible cost.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:do you know what, may be available
Speaker:for people who are self-employed
Speaker:or have
Speaker:so,
Speaker:so that's one right there.
Speaker:Long-term care insurance and
Speaker:then the deduction of the premium.
Speaker:Absolutely.
Speaker:That's a perfect example of that.
Speaker:So the businessing P and then
Speaker:Yes, exactly.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:and also obviously in a work where you
Speaker:have paid time off and you have F M L
Speaker:A and all of those things, you can use
Speaker:them appropriately for caregiving
Speaker:and caregiving for the people.
Speaker:It used to be, would, could only
Speaker:be your spouse, and now they've expanded
Speaker:it to your parents and I think they've
Speaker:even expanded it more to other
Speaker:family members.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So check that out at work.
Speaker:and then you have.
Speaker:EAPs with a mental health.
Speaker:Mental health is a big deal right now.
Speaker:It's everywhere.
Speaker:We're all gonna pay for mental health.
Speaker:Well, if nothing's gonna give you more
Speaker:mental health stress than caregiving,
Speaker:I don't know what it is, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Use that.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Take advantage of it just because
Speaker:you don't feel like you're losing your
Speaker:mind, but you know you're under extra
Speaker:stress Doesn't mean you shouldn't
Speaker:be using a mental health benefit.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So, Yeah.
Speaker:And a lot of it
Speaker:is kind of delayed kind of reaction.
Speaker:It is in it.
Speaker:You're just in it, it's almost
Speaker:like survival
Speaker:and people are just very unschooled
Speaker:about what they have at work that Would
Speaker:be helpful in this kind of a situation.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And if you, have your own, you know,
Speaker:I am a solopreneur and I have,
Speaker:health insurance and through it
Speaker:I do have mental health benefits.
Speaker:And so preneurs
Speaker:hopefully have that element within their
Speaker:insurance as well.
Speaker:yeah.
Speaker:So
Speaker:tell me like,
Speaker:all this costs money.
Speaker:Are there strategies for, how people
Speaker:who are, this audience is
Speaker:primarily founders of service-based
Speaker:businesses.
Speaker:How they can, be, I mean, strategies for
Speaker:them to help access and pay for, these
Speaker:types of services.
Speaker:So, yes.
Speaker:It's almost always gonna depend on
Speaker:whether you're, the person you're
Speaker:caring for has means or doesn't have
Speaker:means, all right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So if they have means they're
Speaker:gonna have to use their own money,
Speaker:but again, let 'em pay you Even if
Speaker:you're bringing in caregivers at
Speaker:$25 an hour, you should still get
Speaker:paid for your work.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Your, time should be paid time.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Get paid.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:10 99.
Speaker:so let's say your parents are people
Speaker:of assets, then if their assets are
Speaker:gonna be used to pay for their care,
Speaker:that's typical.
Speaker:And also ask and find out if they
Speaker:have long-term care policies.
Speaker:I didn't find out I was taking, my
Speaker:brother had ms.
Speaker:The worst kind, very, very
Speaker:incapacitated for a long time.
Speaker:3, 4, 5 years into it.
Speaker:I found out he had a long-term
Speaker:care policy.
Speaker:Oh my goodness.
Speaker:Oh, we got it finally.
Speaker:we got all the benefits.
Speaker:It was wonderful.
Speaker:But it's like, where was that?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So look through your loved one's papers,
Speaker:cuz often they don't even know what
Speaker:they have, right?
Speaker:So, and that's a place where
Speaker:money lies.
Speaker:and sometimes they have life insurance
Speaker:that has a long-term care rider.
Speaker:That's a place where money lies.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Often they have bought that and they
Speaker:forgot about it, or they don't know
Speaker:how to start it.
Speaker:They don't know how to implement
Speaker:it, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Annuities often have this thing,
Speaker:they're called hybrid policies.
Speaker:Now, a lot of people are buying these
Speaker:hybrid policies that are long-term
Speaker:care policy riders attached to a
Speaker:life insurance benefit, so pay
Speaker:attention to that.
Speaker:If you're a solopreneur and
Speaker:you're taking care of a loved one, or
Speaker:if you wanna do it for yourself, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:There's lots of ways to protect.
Speaker:Yourself.
Speaker:for a long-term care event.
Speaker:then there's these agencies.
Speaker:if you're a person without assets,
Speaker:Medicaid actually has ways for
Speaker:you to get paid.
Speaker:Also, your state will have
Speaker:things called a waiver program.
Speaker:That's what it's called.
Speaker:I don't know why, but that's
Speaker:what it's called.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Um, and if your loved one is staying
Speaker:home, they are entitled to benefits
Speaker:to allow someone to help care for them.
Speaker:And that's a way for you to also get
Speaker:paid without going through an agency,
Speaker:just a person who's caring for them
Speaker:and they qualify for Medicaid that
Speaker:you almost always have to do either
Speaker:through an elder lawyer, which
Speaker:would be great, or the area of.
Speaker:Agency, on aging.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Everyone has one somewhere, and it's
Speaker:called something families, sometimes
Speaker:it's called, it's called something
Speaker:like that.
Speaker:But there, every state has 'em, every
Speaker:county has them.
Speaker:Everybody's got 'em.
Speaker:And that's where you would get
Speaker:guidance on where the money lies.
Speaker:so there's money.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Now how you
Speaker:mentioned eight.
Speaker:You even caregiver to
Speaker:eight people is true story simultaneously
Speaker:sometimes.
Speaker:how did you do this?
Speaker:Sometimes it was started out with
Speaker:my grandmother who was 92 and came to
Speaker:live with me and my two-year-old
Speaker:at the same time.
Speaker:So talk about a sandwich, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And those two just loved
Speaker:ganging up on me.
Speaker:They thought it was hilarious to
Speaker:be living this life Of chaos.
Speaker:Of chaos.
Speaker:and then I had several, great aunt,
Speaker:my mother-in-law, my brother-in-law that
Speaker:I told you about Ms.
Speaker:while I was the primary
Speaker:caregiver for my brother-in-law
Speaker:who had ms.
Speaker:My very best friend fell down a flight
Speaker:of stairs and had a traumatic brain
Speaker:injury and her husband of 34 years.
Speaker:Left.
Speaker:Her and She only had friends, her
Speaker:children lived on the other side of
Speaker:the country, and so I became her
Speaker:primary caregiver.
Speaker:And then her, our other friends also
Speaker:stepped up, so it was simultaneous.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And all the while being a
Speaker:solopreneur, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So, I'm not gonna lie, my business
Speaker:slowed down very dramatically.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:but I'm also not gonna lie and say
Speaker:that that wasn't.
Speaker:the key and the impetus to create
Speaker:what I do now.
Speaker:So there's the gift, right?
Speaker:I see what's happening and yeah.
Speaker:it was hard.
Speaker:Yeah, it was hard.
Speaker:I spent a lot of time taking care
Speaker:of my kids and my family members and
Speaker:my friend, because I could, and I will
Speaker:tell you, I have an amazing, awesome
Speaker:husband mm-hmm.
Speaker:Who was more than willing to let me
Speaker:be that person.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:That's probably the biggest key.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:And you
Speaker:said, Work-life balance does
Speaker:not exist.
Speaker:What's the closest thing
Speaker:that comes to it?
Speaker:Like what?
Speaker:How
Speaker:do we protect ourselves?
Speaker:If you wait long enough, it
Speaker:comes around.
Speaker:The closest thing that comes to it is
Speaker:recognizing that you have to put yourself
Speaker:first sometimes.
Speaker:And not when you're dead, and not when
Speaker:you're exhausted, and not when you're
Speaker:yelling at everyone because you've
Speaker:just burnt out.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:That you have to figure out
Speaker:what that is.
Speaker:So my, calendar has, a workout in
Speaker:it four days a week.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:And that is sacred time.
Speaker:Nobody gets that hour except my
Speaker:trainer, who I hate.
Speaker:it's like that, right?
Speaker:and if it's, only a half hour, because
Speaker:you have, there was a time when I
Speaker:had a 15 year old and a 12 year old,
Speaker:and I was taking them to practice,
Speaker:and my husband was a traveling
Speaker:salesman, so, right.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Larry, my brother-in-law
Speaker:is five miles from me in an
Speaker:independent living, but his wheelchair
Speaker:broke down.
Speaker:He can't get anywhere.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:I have to find, so yes.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:If it's a half hour, I'm gonna read this
Speaker:book and nobody's gonna talk to me.
Speaker:every night from nine to nine
Speaker:30, go away, whatever it is.
Speaker:and then it's a bigger thing,
Speaker:like those mental health things,
Speaker:like you've got to not be, A martyr.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:The thing where they tell you to
Speaker:put your mask on before you, in
Speaker:the, if the oxygen goes out in the
Speaker:plane.
Speaker:But my mom has given me such great
Speaker:martyr lessons.
Speaker:It's really hard to, let that
Speaker:influence go.
Speaker:And if she heard me, she'd be like, okay.
Speaker:She couldn't hear me.
Speaker:She's right down the street.
Speaker:Well, she gave you those great jeans,
Speaker:yeah.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:so that's how you get more
Speaker:balance mm-hmm.
Speaker:Is by, by shoving it in that calendar.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And then, I mean, like everything,
Speaker:right, Erin, life just sort
Speaker:of balances out.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:But I just don't want you to be
Speaker:destitute at the end of it.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:That's what I don't want.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:what if it's, let's say you're
Speaker:in your fifties and you've been letting
Speaker:all these things.
Speaker:Then what?
Speaker:So, you mean like you don't have
Speaker:long-term care insurance and
Speaker:you don't have, so look it up.
Speaker:I mean, at least look,
Speaker:pretending that you can't have it.
Speaker:Oh God.
Speaker:Is this like the biggest thing that
Speaker:you do right in your work, outside
Speaker:of what we're talking about, but
Speaker:pretending that you can't have it
Speaker:because you don't do any homework
Speaker:about what that actually means?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Is the biggest disservice you can
Speaker:do to yourself?
Speaker:Just look it up.
Speaker:see what's out there.
Speaker:See what you have.
Speaker:Talk to a professional
Speaker:who says, okay.
Speaker:I see you have four life insurance
Speaker:policies here.
Speaker:Why?
Speaker:Maybe we can consolidate them and
Speaker:make sure there's a long-term care
Speaker:rider to that.
Speaker:So now you're protected and
Speaker:do this one time thing and get
Speaker:your documents in order, okay?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:You're done.
Speaker:Great job.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Mommy's proud.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I will
Speaker:say I'm one of the people who's,
Speaker:you know, done so many things online
Speaker:without kind of that intermediary
Speaker:professional, like a broker,
Speaker:for insurance or even, for travel.
Speaker:We kind of are used to doing things
Speaker:on our own, but there are still.
Speaker:Insurance brokers in the world is that
Speaker:we are and I believe these are complex,
Speaker:this isn't just life insurance.
Speaker:This is a complex situation and I
Speaker:really believe, just like lawyers,
Speaker:you can, I'm gonna tell you right up
Speaker:front, you can go online and type in
Speaker:power of attorney.
Speaker:And something will come up.
Speaker:I'm not gonna ever tell you to do that.
Speaker:You can do it for your 18 year old.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Because you'll get a standard document
Speaker:and they don't own anything, so
Speaker:who cares, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:But if you have an ira, if you
Speaker:have somebody you need, that you're
Speaker:worrying about who to be in charge of.
Speaker:I think that's a
Speaker:conversation with a professional.
Speaker:What kind of powers do I really want
Speaker:them to have?
Speaker:What kind of authority do I
Speaker:really want this person to have?
Speaker:how much am I gonna let them into my
Speaker:stuff or not into my stuff or, whatever.
Speaker:I don't recommend that you do
Speaker:that online.
Speaker:However, if it is absolutely
Speaker:impossible for you to, and all lawyers
Speaker:aren't ridiculously out, outrageously
Speaker:expensive, don't think that either.
Speaker:Cause it's not a true story, also
Speaker:not a true story.
Speaker:You might end up costing yourself
Speaker:more money by doing the wrong thing.
Speaker:Than by spending some money up
Speaker:front and doing the right thing.
Speaker:We bring
Speaker:up another point like say you are
Speaker:not married and you need to find.
Speaker:Someone to be the Your person.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:To your person.
Speaker:Like, what should we be looking for in,
Speaker:okay.
Speaker:So it has to be a person that you
Speaker:trust, that you really, truly trust.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:That is going to because in this
Speaker:scenario you can't, you're
Speaker:incapacitated and it could be temporary.
Speaker:But you're incapacitated.
Speaker:Now I will say that anybody who takes on
Speaker:the job as a power of attorney is by
Speaker:law a fiduciary.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So by law they are going to be
Speaker:looked at if they steal from you or
Speaker:whatever, but you don't want that.
Speaker:You don't wanna deal with that.
Speaker:So you want someone who you can trust.
Speaker:You want someone who's.
Speaker:Probably financially savvy on the
Speaker:financial side, and that might not be
Speaker:the same person.
Speaker:Maybe you want two people,
Speaker:someone who's much more savvy or
Speaker:compassionate on the healthcare side.
Speaker:don't pull the plug.
Speaker:I'm having an appendectomy.
Speaker:Just cause I don't think my brother
Speaker:listens to this, that he's financial
Speaker:power attorney, but somebody
Speaker:else, the medical power attorney.
Speaker:Yes,
Speaker:yes.
Speaker:And, I agree for people and
Speaker:Florida, I'm in Pennsylvania, so I
Speaker:am only licensed to practice law here.
Speaker:But I will tell you that Florida has,
Speaker:apparently I got a have friends in
Speaker:Florida, there's some weird thing
Speaker:in there, laws that says if your
Speaker:executor has to be a blood relative, Hmm.
Speaker:I know.
Speaker:And I didn't believe my friend when she
Speaker:told me that, I'm like, that can't be
Speaker:true, but mm-hmm.
Speaker:It's true.
Speaker:Hmm.
Speaker:So what if you don't have any
Speaker:blood relatives?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Exactly.
Speaker:Or what if you don't like them?
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:You haven't talked to them.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:In 30 years.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:so a person.
Speaker:That you trust in a person that
Speaker:has knowledge and capability.
Speaker:Even if it's just for a temporary
Speaker:time, is the person you and you should
Speaker:talk to them first and say, I'm going
Speaker:to ask you if something happens
Speaker:to be this person.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Will you do that for me?
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:You definitely don't want it to
Speaker:be a surprise.
Speaker:Oh no.
Speaker:Not a good idea.
Speaker:Because it can
Speaker:be a fair amount of work.
Speaker:Absolutely, yes.
Speaker:So
Speaker:this is the Hourly Exit podcast, and we
Speaker:talk about building a scalable and
Speaker:saleable business.
Speaker:And so in the context of that,
Speaker:for our
Speaker:solopreneurs or entrepreneurs,
Speaker:where does this fit into making sure
Speaker:they're building a solid, sustainable
Speaker:business?
Speaker:So here's the thing, if you are
Speaker:working on a solid, sustainable business
Speaker:right now, What do you have in place
Speaker:in case something happens to you?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Even if it's temporary.
Speaker:What happens if you have to step out
Speaker:for three months or six months
Speaker:because you got hit by a car, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:What do you have in place?
Speaker:That's what Kathy is trying to
Speaker:get you to do.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Put something in place to give you
Speaker:the peace of mind so that what Erin
Speaker:has done, which has helped you
Speaker:build this business that will sustain
Speaker:itself while you're healing.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:That's gonna keep going and you're
Speaker:gonna be over here and all your
Speaker:documents and everything is in
Speaker:place, and you don't have to worry about
Speaker:crisis planning.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So these two professionals
Speaker:sitting at this table now talking to
Speaker:you have just given you peace of mind.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So few people think about that.
Speaker:nobody thinks they're gonna to
Speaker:get hit by a bus or get long covid
Speaker:or whatever it is.
Speaker:Right,
Speaker:Function.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:It's all sort.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:I mean, and, it could be as, I don't
Speaker:wanna say simple as long covid.
Speaker:It could, because that's not simple,
Speaker:but it could be as, Like, nobody
Speaker:sees it but you.
Speaker:I'm exhausted.
Speaker:It's like mono, right?
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:I can do two hours of work today and
Speaker:then I am done.
Speaker:I, am done.
Speaker:I cannot do one more minute.
Speaker:Right?
Speaker:And I need someone to do my banking.
Speaker:I need someone to go get my car serviced.
Speaker:I need someone, somebody who
Speaker:has authority to do that.
Speaker:Just go do that.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Peace of mind.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:So smart.
Speaker:So, I.
Speaker:Typically don't have lawyers on,
Speaker:but I'll ask, are you building your
Speaker:business with an eye towards selling it
Speaker:someday?
Speaker:Well, I'm not building my
Speaker:legal business.
Speaker:I'm gonna be perfectly
Speaker:honest with you.
Speaker:I'm actually more your client than
Speaker:I am a lawyer because you can
Speaker:see I got three books behind me.
Speaker:I've written three books, and my.
Speaker:Really, work life is speaking to groups,
Speaker:speaking to ideally large corporations
Speaker:who will bring in their employees to
Speaker:talk about these kinds of issues,
Speaker:but also about what the employer can
Speaker:do for them when this caregiving
Speaker:thing affects them as a worker.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:Right.
Speaker:So I'm a speaker.
Speaker:I'm a speaker and a writer more than
Speaker:I am a lawyer.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:but family and friends, you know,
Speaker:there's eight different family
Speaker:members and friends.
Speaker:Well, there's lots more them around
Speaker:really.
Speaker:Cottage industry, you have basically
Speaker:family members.
Speaker:Great.
Speaker:Therefore, well that's wonderful.
Speaker:Well, thank you for sharing that.
Speaker:So as we wrap up three final things.
Speaker:One, the, goal of my podcast
Speaker:and my consulting business is to
Speaker:help create a more, equitable economy,
Speaker:one that works for more of us.
Speaker:And so I'd love for people to
Speaker:share a personal organization who's
Speaker:doing work in that space that they'd
Speaker:like the audience to find out more about.
Speaker:my favorite, I'm on the board of
Speaker:something called Nancy's house.
Speaker:And Nancy's house breaks the isolation
Speaker:of caregiving.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:And what we do is, although we
Speaker:have lots of small programs that
Speaker:you can join in through Facebook,
Speaker:the Facebook group, just look up
Speaker:Nancy's house and you can come in for
Speaker:group counseling twice a month.
Speaker:That's free.
Speaker:we have.
Speaker:Our main mission is to break this
Speaker:isolation by having retreats that
Speaker:are usually three days long, three
Speaker:days, two nights in a five star.
Speaker:Bed and breakfast where we provide
Speaker:counseling, yoga, massages,
Speaker:and love it.
Speaker:There's only 10 people.
Speaker:Mm-hmm.
Speaker:So you actually build a,
Speaker:community right there of people
Speaker:who understand what you're
Speaker:going through.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:it is a wonderful, wonderful
Speaker:organization.
Speaker:Yeah.
Speaker:Oh, that's
Speaker:fantastic.
Speaker:Thank you for that.
Speaker:And so is there something exciting
Speaker:happening in your business
Speaker:or something new that you'd
Speaker:like to tell us
Speaker:about or an offer for the audience?
Speaker:You like to share?
Speaker:Well, I always offer this to
Speaker:any audience.
Speaker:You can contact me.
Speaker:I'm sure we're gonna give you
Speaker:it in the notes.
Speaker:Yes, everything.
Speaker:Share notes, absolutely.
Speaker:Kathy dot sikorski gmail.com and I
Speaker:will talk to you for half hour
Speaker:about anything you wanna talk about.
Speaker:We can talk about my earrings, we
Speaker:can talk about caregiving, we
Speaker:can talk about.
Speaker:But I will talk to you hopefully
Speaker:about these important issues.
Speaker:If you have any questions, as I
Speaker:said, I'm only licensed in
Speaker:Pennsylvania, but I can give you some
Speaker:general guidance and if any real
Speaker:personal questions about caregiving
Speaker:or whatever, yes, you get 30
Speaker:minutes of my time.
Speaker:Wonderful.
Speaker:That
Speaker:is so generous.
Speaker:Thank you.
Speaker:And so finally, where can people
Speaker:find you in addition to your
Speaker:website, which you just, shared?
Speaker:Are there other places you hang out
Speaker:online that we can
Speaker:find?
Speaker:Oh gosh, yeah.
Speaker:Just Google me, honestly.
Speaker:I'm like the first four pages
Speaker:under my name.
Speaker:If you can type Kathy Sikorski, you
Speaker:will see everything that I am doing.
Speaker:I'm on LinkedIn.
Speaker:Feel free to connect with me on LinkedIn.
Speaker:I love connecting with people in.
Speaker:All kinds of work on LinkedIn
Speaker:because caregiving touches everyone.
Speaker:So connect with me on LinkedIn.
Speaker:I'm on Amazon for my books.
Speaker:so just type in my name again and,
Speaker:you will see lots of things that I'm
Speaker:doing in terms of writing articles
Speaker:for people and on podcasts and, yeah.
Speaker:Wonderful.
Speaker:I'm everywhere.
Speaker:Thank you so much.
Speaker:You've
Speaker:been incredibly generous with
Speaker:your time and your wisdom.
Speaker:Much appreciated.
Speaker:Erin, thank you so much for having me.
Speaker:I think this is such an important
Speaker:conversation and I'm so honored that you
Speaker:recognize that as well, so I really
Speaker:truly appreciate it.